It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Mayhem

Wrapped it tight with a bow on top

Said "don’t feed it" — guess we forgot

What looked like a gift just cracked apart

Now the lights go dead and the screaming starts

Flickering strings — snow on the ground

Voices laugh from the attic now

Turned too fast, they shed their skin

Claws, teeth and holiday sin

Mayhem wrapped in holiday cheer

Smiles rot when they appear

Cute at first, then grow vicious

Pure mayhem once superstitious

Another reason to hate Christmas

Microwaved ’til its guts went pop

One in a blender — turned into slop

Stabbed it dead in a frantic hack

But kill them all, or they’ll be back

Locked the rest behind a screen

Gas and fire wiped it clean

Watched them burn — a perfect end

But one escaped — a final friend

Mayhem wrapped in holiday cheer

Smiles rot when they appear

Cute at first, then grow vicious

Pure mayhem once superstitious

Another reason to hate Christmas

Joy’s just a costume

That depression resists

While some open presents

Others open their wrists

Mayhem wrapped in holiday cheer

Smiles rot when they appear

Cute at first, then grow vicious

Pure mayhem once superstitious

Another reason to hate Christmas

Mayhem waits beneath the floor

Scratching, laughing, wanting more

Peace on earth? that lie won’t last

Christmas cheer — shattered like glass