Here Comes Clowny Clause

‘Twas the night before Christmas, all tucked into bed

Till a killer named Art… came back from the dead

He slid down the chimney with an axe in his hand

Turning Silent Night into slaughter so grand

He hacked up the family one by one with delight

Painting the walls red this holy night

When all fell silent and the carols had died

He dipped cookies in milk by the corpses with pride

Here comes Clowny Clause — right down nightmare lane

His sack is filled with gruesome gifts to make you scream in pain

He doesn’t care if you beg or pray — no one’s getting saved

Slay-bells ringing bloody chorus as he laughs at the depraved

He put old Santa on ice, stole his suit (so merry!)

Now this jolly imposter preys on crowds unwary

At the bustling mall children line up with glee

While he hands out presents… tick, tick, BOOM! screams and debris

Smoke fills the air — screams fade in the storm

Charred tinsel flutters on this black Christmas morn

Here comes Clowny Clause — right down nightmare lane

His sack is filled with gruesome gifts to make you scream in pain

He doesn’t care if you beg or pray — no one’s getting saved

Slay-bells ringing bloody chorus as he laughs at the depraved

Gift unwrapped — sword inside

Teeth get snapped — she won’t die

One clean swing — make him pay

Clown bleeds out on Christmas Day

Here comes Clowny Clause — he’ll return for another round

So you better watch out (you’d better not cry) when you hear that haunting sound

He’ll deck your halls with blood and fear — no soul will be left clear

Merry Christmas to all – he’ll be back again next year